Tuesday, July 28, 2009♥
	so what if what you said is true, so what if you said makes sense, so what. so what if im using him, so what if im toying with his feelings, so what if im pretending to like him when i dont, so what if i treat him badly, so what. what business izzit of yours may i know, mister? you act like you know everything when you dont have the single shyt whats going on. okay maybe you know what im thinking of what im feeling but i tell you straight here, you have no right to tell me all this bullshyt here. you should be lucky man, cos i.ve never treated you the way i treat him. to you i would be careful with my words, i would think before i speak and i would never raise my voice at you nor take it out on you. until now, you still dont get it do you. okay after all the scoldings on top, i did some serious thinking.. aha what you said do makes sense but im jus hanging on to delusions. i jus wanna make myself believe but after what you said, i totally failed to do so. my feelings for you was a thing of the past, whats left here is jus some bits and pieces of evidence showing that we once knew each other no more feelings, jus reliance and to you people, if your motive of doing all those oh-so-damn-obvious acts is to let me know that you people are still not stopping and want me to know that you people exist in this world, thanks i.ve got it Blogged @ 8:43 PM

	Friday, July 24, 2009♥
	我以为经过了这么多磨练我已经变得坚强了, 但是面对这种时候, 我还是需要你的安尉, 需要你来哄我, 我才能感觉较安心些.. oh man, i feel like a spoilt baby>(! drained out, i.ve no idea how much longer i can continue holding on very, tired Blogged @ 7:48 PM

	Tuesday, July 21, 2009♥
	hi and yes im still alive.. school life is busy and tiring, but thats expected i guess (?) left 90plus days to Os nia.. give it one last shot please suying. you.ve no choice, you gotta do it, you get it(yes i do) last week on the bus theres this guy sitting infront of me who keep turning back and smiling and talking, and i dont even know him, i.ve no idea why recently people whom i do not know keep staring or smiling or talking to me.. spare me please people(strangers)! ohwell, i forgot what i wanted to say, ah forget it, im off to bathe now, bye people:D! Blogged @ 6:35 PM

	Thursday, July 16, 2009♥
	you know what, forget about the previous post, it seems like im jus talking some silly crap which doesnt apply to me at all, okay so jus forget it i dont look forward to school tmr, egeog test on natural vegetation which has 3chapters, zuo wen to be handed in, elit ppt to be done, elit unseen prose to be completed, emath probability wkst3 and emath paper 1 to be done and gone through tmr.. how come theres so many hmwk!! im going berserk. i can imagine myself in woodbridge.. help me, my eyes are closing, im tired, sleeping for only 4plus hours everyday is really not enough, i wanna sleep i wanna sleep i wanna sleep, bed please? boy, all that you have done to me, i did it too, i feel like im unknowingly taking revenge and in actual fact im hurting you much more than you hurt me, you might have guessed it but you wouldnt wanna hear it from me i guess (?) Blogged @ 7:03 PM

	Tuesday, July 14, 2009♥
	我始终没有勇气面对你的笑, 当我想逃却逃不了. 傻一点也好, 其他的我不想知道. 好与坏其实都不重要, 我早已失去逃离的力量. i really really wanna forget everything and go back to the past, i.ve really tried, please believe me, but thinking of that incident jus makes me all pissed off from now onwards, everything will be said and done only in my heart, im not going to breathe a word about you to anyone anymore, unless something really big happens but its okay i still have my blog to talk to (i sound like a lunatic!!?) 我的爱回不来了.. Blogged @ 8:01 PM

	Monday, July 13, 2009♥
	o m g, saturday went out and bought 3skirts which cost 200plus$(!!), 2tshirts at 30$, one dress and one top from mummy friend's shop(i dunno how much that cost) imma going to save more more $$ to buy clothes!! heehz:D this sunday meeting esther go gym then shop, good good:D but.. before this sunday can arrive, im going crazy cos of school.. im tired, im drained out, im sleepy, im stressed, im DEAD!! left 104days to Os i think (?) omg omg someone gimme a tight slap please!! bravo! well done suying! you.ve jus wasted your 10days' worth of effort, how great!! impossible to carry on already, so you dont have to try anymore btw, mariah carey's obsessed is so damn nice!!:DDDD Blogged @ 6:56 PM

	Saturday, July 11, 2009♥
	现在挽回还来得及吗? happy bday to you, how are you, i miss you Blogged @ 8:38 PM

	Thursday, July 9, 2009♥
	her stomach gulped coldy with sudden shock. her instinct had long suspected that he was betraying her. memories whirled in her mind as she put all the broken pieces of evidence together. she was shocked by what she saw. indeed, her horrified senses had proven her right. her hands were now alert to a point of shivering. the flesh inside her thighs blenched. she swallowed uneasily and asked 'why?'. tomorrow i.ve three tests waiting for me and i went out today, i felt like i jus spent time which i dont have and that is very bad T^T omg i dont wanna fail my amath test but i jus find integration difficult! 张素莹, 你无药可救了.. Blogged @ 7:33 PM

	Tuesday, July 7, 2009♥
	tchers are indeed the best helpers, they help you in your studies, they help you with whatever problems you have be it friendship or relationship, even what they say is so very true. quoted from ms tan 'if you love someone, let him go. if he comes back, hes yours. if he doesnt, he never was.' wow thats like so inspirational(is there such a word) man!:D during chinese today i was asked to read out the passage, and.. gosh! God knows how many stupid mistakes i made!! my chinese really.. detoriated alot man, time to buck up suying! time to really really settle down and study! time is like running out, so we got the timetable for prelimTwo and was told that the date will be pushed back 5days later, and chem and physics Os spa is like so soon, so is Os english oral. ah by typing this, it freaks me out! when can i sleep, im tired manD: HAPPY BIRTHDAY ESTHER!!:D oh and esther is back, yaye:DDDD HAPPY BIRTHDAY EELING!!:D Blogged @ 7:26 PM

	Monday, July 6, 2009♥
	wow seems like theres alittle commotion down there at my tagboard, sorta used to it already since its not the first time it happened to me anyways now to he/she/it who tagged me, i know you have been anticipating for my response to your so-called tags, probably sitting behind the computer screen refreshing after an hour/a min's interval whenever possible jus to see my reply to you, thinking it may have the likelihood of entertaining you. but you are so wrong. i shall jus take it that you have nothing much meaningful to do and you.re feeling so damn bored staying at home, thats why you did something so childish and babyish. so you, yes you. sit comfortably back against your chair and open your eyes big big. read my post to you, sentence by sentence, word by word. this post is almost fully dedicated to you, alone. you said you dont understand why cant i look at things from another point of view, but why cant you look at things from my point of view? when i first saw your tag i really wanted to know your identity as well as telling you everything hoping that you can understand, but now i no longer see the need to. seriously, i dont owe you any explanations do i? neither do i owe you anything do i? so wont you jus leave me alone. you jus come outta nowhere and ruin my mood, is this the purpose of your existence in the world? perhaps you see things more clearly cos you.re an outsider. but in terms of feelings, you.re nowhere near. and please, when did i even say i hate them? i didnt so please dont put words in my mouth. what i said was 'i wont hate you nor your friends' so please read properly i hope you will stop everything. id rather you be the coward who sits behind the screen typing and smiling happily away. dont ever reveal your real name cos if i really do know you, i dont want us to turn into enemies. and if you.re envy of what im experiencing, you can have all of it. im not proud of the fact that all these happened, im sick of it man Blogged @ 11:18 AM

	Saturday, July 4, 2009♥
	im feeling pretty freshened up and well today!:D from now onwards, im going to put the past behind and look towards the future, especially when im having my Os this year! i wont hate you nor your friends, cos God says "Love your enemies." i jus wanna have nothing to do with you people, grant me this simple wish please? everything starts anew today and i.ll have time and energy to do what im supposed to do, good good:D Dear God, Thankyou for being with me whenever im feeling down. Please continue giving me grace and the ability to forgive. Please also do let me remember the purpose of everything and do not let anger get ahead of me. Thankyou God. In Jesus name i say, Amen. HAPPY BIRTHDAY RANDY!!:D Blogged @ 11:42 AM

	Friday, July 3, 2009♥
	im very tired, both physically and mentally i need a break. tomorrow when i wake up, i promise i.ll be fine you did it alittle bit too late, its of no use at all to jus: thanks my friend! you.re right, i knew it long ago that my feelings had changed. its all cos of ego issues i believe? it really doesnt matter now. the reason im feeling angry was cos i felt it was unfair to be paying for something which i never even did! what logic is that. you.re right, im numb already. but its okay, i mean who cares. i lost a friend (if you even call that a friend) but i realised i.ve so many true friends around me! thats a blessing in disguise!:D and thanks to everyone who have lent me a listening ear, thankyou!:D Blogged @ 8:22 PM

	Thursday, July 2, 2009♥
	i wanted so much to tell the whole world about your evil deeds, but i was thinking a victim who goes around complaining to others about the evil deeds of someone else is also considered a bully. and i dont wanna be labelled a bully. i took such great lengths to avoid you the whole day, and jus as i was thinking 'wow great! i managed to pass the day without seeing your face' pump! there you were standing right infront of me with your beloved friend walking towards the canteen, and in case you people think im deaf, im not. please i can hear it okay will you please jus stop acting innocent? its so damn irritating. you.re not that innocent please. infact you.re the best actor in the whole wide world. and please, i know more than you think i do. and to W, like hey i dont even know you and you come create all this stupid extra trouble, as if its so fun, so primary school can very fun right. go ahead and play with yourself, or you can ask your beloved friend to join in, im not the least bit interested in this kinda stupid game, this time its real. you know very well that jus afew silly sweet words from you and im on my way back. you got me back, and the next moment you dump me straight away. how fast jus these few days, i was thinking 'okay maybe i was over-sensitive', but now i know im not, im jus over-stupid. why. why are you always like that. you changed so much, till i feel i dunno you at all from this moment after i click 'publish post', everything will end that second, stop all connections please. you.ve used up all my energy, i.ve got none left to deal with you and your dear friends. so if you people want to write whatever rubbish and place it in my class or anywhere in the school, or perhaps you wanna continue with your previous act which is msging me, and maybe even find a new way such as announcing over the pa system, by all means please cos you all know very well, i dont give a shyt anymore Blogged @ 7:04 PM

	Wednesday, July 1, 2009♥
	yesterday, jus yesterday, i was wondering to myself 'after the holidays i guess they.re going to forget all about it and not do anything anymore', little did i know today i was proven wrong.. i.ve had enough, not saying anything not doing anything not scolding anyone doesnt mean i dont feel anything. in case you dunno, im a human, i have feelings i know the consequence that i have to face after i sent that msg to you, but i dont give a shyt anymore, since you dare to do it, you would have known the consequences. i dread going to school, i feel like an idiot i suddenly have nothing to say cos of this stupid thing, i.ve totally no mood to do any homework. thanks ah.. Blogged @ 7:22 PM